Tuesday
August 18, 2009 / 5:12 p.m.
I'm at the Central Library. Getting some books to read. I've decided I can't take the political news much anymore, so to kill downtime I have to get by with books... as opposed to flicking on the computer and reading the latest crap about the health reform debate.
My knee is killing me today, like never before. It must not be a coincidence that I just started running 6 miles+ a day...
If I'm going down stairs, my left knee feels like someone's grinding the dull end of an allen wrench into my joint-- right where the patella is.
Just figures. Right when I was getting into really good shape this happens. And the way it killed stress, going up to run in the morning. Not even thinking about it... just going and forgetting everything.
Weightlifting is for the body and is to further strength and anger... the complex of it. Running is exercising the heart and calming the nerves... exerting the internal motor right up to the point where you can't really go on anymore, but you're at peace when you're done... and okay.
Anyway, I don't know what's going to happen. It's been my one thing.
Work isn't much of anything. The foodstamp office called today and wants to do a renewal interview over the phone...
Again I am right at the point where I wouldn't qualify if I made, literally, 30 bucks more a month than I do.
They're always so suspicious of you, and always implying that if you're lying and get caught, things (bad things.. horrible things) will start to happen to you. I can't say anything other than that I don't know how else to earn more money right now... Shit, the economy is killing me. You think I want to be on foodstamps? Fuck that... But it's like whack-a-mole... you knock one job down and have more income, some other job disappears down the memory hole... over and over again it's been like this, for the last two years. It's impossible to ever build on anything and have income where I could, you know, buy a macbook (for writing) or to get some nice clothes.